Back to School: Routines, Resilience, and Real-Life Parenting Moments
By Katie Lindskog, Owner & Therapist at Lakeside Counseling Center
As a mom of four, I know that back-to-school season is often described as a “fresh start” — new pencils, crisp planners, fresh routines. But if I’m being honest, it can also feel like chaos wrapped in a calendar. Between coordinating after-school activities, packing lunches, managing homework, and making sure everyone has at least one matching sock… it’s a lot.
This year, though, back-to-school season came with a different kind of challenge — one that stretched me not as a scheduler, but as a parent.
The Pushback I Didn’t See Coming
My oldest just turned 13, and recently decided she was “done” with her after-school music class. Not just done for the day — done, done. Five minutes before we were supposed to leave, she looked me in the eye and said, “I’m not going. I’m quitting.”
I wish I could say I responded with calm, mindful curiosity — but I didn’t. I felt ambushed, angry, and heartbroken all at once. My mind spiraled: Where did I go wrong? Is this what the teenage years are going to be like?
And in that moment, my frustration took over. I raised my voice, said things I regretted, and rattled off consequences without thinking. It wasn’t my finest parenting moment.
Sitting With the Hard Stuff
The next 24 hours were heavy. I replayed the scene in my head over and over, caught between guilt and worry. I also tried to reframe it — to remind myself that what she was doing (setting a boundary, asserting autonomy) was actually developmentally appropriate. It’s what we want our teens to learn to do. But when it’s your own child, and you’re in the thick of it, that perspective is much harder to hold.
My partner and I decided we needed to circle back — not just to talk about the music class, but to reconnect as a family. We wanted her to see that we were aligned, that we were listening, and that we could model repair.
Repairing and Reconnecting
When we finally sat down together, I started by owning my part. I apologized for my words, my tone, and my reaction. I told her I was angry and caught off guard, but that I should have handled it differently.
Then, we talked about why we had signed her up for the class in the first place. It wasn’t about perfection or performance — it was about connection. In a world where loneliness and isolation are on the rise, connection matters more than ever. Music, sports, art, volunteering — these aren’t just hobbies; they’re opportunities to feel seen and to build community.
We talked about what happens when we don’t stay connected — how it can lead to self-doubt, sadness, and disconnection from who we are. I even shared a bit of my own experience as an introvert — how I didn’t always love the activities I tried, but I appreciated what they gave me: belonging and growth.
Together, we came up with logical, natural consequences. If she truly wanted to quit, she’d help pay for the unused lessons. We also encouraged her to find something else that felt like a better fit — something that would still offer her a way to connect.
To my surprise, she responded beautifully. She owned her part, too — acknowledging her words and how she could have handled things differently. We ended the conversation with hugs, tears, and the reminder that our love is unconditional — even in the messy moments.
Lessons in Growth — for Both of Us
That moment reminded me that back-to-school isn’t just about new routines for kids — it’s about growth opportunities for parents, too. We’re learning right alongside our children: learning when to hold on, when to let go, and how to navigate the space in between.
Parenting through the tween and teen years is not for the faint of heart. But it’s in these moments — the ones that throw us off balance — that we have the greatest chance to model emotional repair, humility, and connection.
And that’s really what this season is about. Not perfect transitions, but real ones.
How Lakeside Counseling Center Can Help
At Lakeside Counseling Center, we understand that transitions — whether it’s back-to-school, navigating adolescence, or managing the shifting seasons of family life — can be overwhelming. Parenting is rewarding, but it’s also deeply challenging, especially when emotions, expectations, and growing independence collide.
Our team of compassionate clinicians specializes in parenting support, family therapy, and individual counseling to help parents and kids reconnect and thrive through every stage of life.
We offer both in-person therapy in Eau Claire and Madison, Wisconsin, as well as virtual therapy sessions statewide for those who need flexibility and support from home. Whether you’re navigating back-to-school stress, a power struggle with your teen, or just trying to find balance in your family routine, you don’t have to do it alone.
At Lakeside, we believe that connection — with yourself, your children, and your partner — is the foundation for emotional health and growth.
If you’re ready to take the next step toward calm, connection, and confidence, our team is here to walk beside you.
Visit us at www.lakesidecounsel.com to learn more or to schedule a session today.
About the Author
Katie Lindskog is a licensed therapist and the owner of Lakeside Counseling Center, where she leads a team dedicated to helping individuals and families navigate life’s transitions with compassion and care. As a mom of four, she blends professional expertise with personal insight to help parents find grace and growth in the messiest moments of family life.